Karina, Jill, Courtney, Laura and I were pregnant together in 2016. Our six children (Laura had twins) were born within four months of each other. I’m not sure I’ve ever consciously appreciated how truly special it was for the five of us to share that time together — along with all of our good, bad and ugly parallels since giving birth — until I sat down to write about Zolan. Continue reading The Light You Seek
Before I became parent, I could never picture what Sydney would look like. While I was pregnant, I studied our sonograms, trying to imagine our baby girl’s features. I spent countless moments trying to visualize a miniature combination of me and Carlyle, but I was never able to piece together her piercing eyes, her button nose, her tiny mouth… Continue reading Before I Became a Parent
I ate up every word of Bringing Up Bébé while pregnant. I was certain that executing each and every French-honed parenting technique in the book was going to make me a rockstar American mom. However, after nearly two years of actual motherhood, I later listened to French Children Don’t Throw Food on Audible with a bit of a suppressed appetite. (All puns detected above intended.) I do empathize with the critical American and British responses to Druckerman’s controversial books, but I was still able to discern helpful take-aways based on her perceptions of French parenting methods. Here were mine… Continue reading French Food For Thought
I’m not sure that’s what it’s called. I can’t find anything about the Motherland Philosophy online, but that’s what I’ve been calling it ever since I heard a mama-friend say it. Continue reading The Motherland Philosophy
And avoiding assumptions about her behavior. Continue reading Interpreting My Toddler’s Tantrums
If there were things I wanted, sometimes my parents didn’t give them to me. If there were problems I faced, sometimes they didn’t solve them for me. If there were goals I couldn’t reach, sometimes they didn’t enable me to achieve them. Continue reading One of the Best Things My Parents Ever Did
I thought I loved my godson and nieces and nephews unconditionally. I brazenly declared that there was nothing I wouldn’t do for them and I do still believe that. However, if I’m truly honest with myself, I recognize that there could be limitations in the lengths I would legitimately go for them. The unconditional love for children who aren’t one’s own is not tested everyday with an endless stream of obligations, sacrifices and disappointments — the conditions that can ultimately prove and disprove bona fide unconditional love. Continue reading Before I Became a Parent
What can happen when women aren’t self-aggrandizing, comparing, competing and frenemy’ing? They become a genuine tribe for as long — or as little — as needed. Continue reading Womanhood is a Tribe
Before I became a parent, I thought I was going to exceed the standard of execution and follow-through for all the methods in “Bringing Up Bébé,” “Twelve Hours’ Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old,” “No Drama Discipline” and a plethora of other parenting books in our arsenal. Also, in the nine months before a baby rendered one or both hands virtually useless (or otherwise occupied) roughly 90% of my waking hours, Carlyle had amassed a sizable hardcover and paperback library of parental self-help titles, and all of their parenting methods seemed achievable. Continue reading Before I Became a Parent
It’s just that the trials and tribulations of parenthood rarely resonate until we wake up in the trenches. We either assume the stories have been inadvertently exaggerated or we are internally (yet blissfully) confident that it couldn’t be that bad. Or — through no fault of our own — we simply weren’t drawn to the information because we were naturally occupied with our preparental lives. Blog posts about breastfeeding complications were not essential reading for the boardroom. Continue reading Everyone Tells Us How Hard It Is
MOMganized 